My pet rabbit is trying to kill me.
Every day he’s getting cuter and it’s really hurting my heart.
A year ago he was a normal sized rabbit.
Brown patches, bit of a red stain in his eyes from a previous infection.
But still, a nice rabbit.
Since then he’s been shrinking.
And his eyes have been getting bigger.
Like really big.
Like crazy big.
And his fur is getting whiter.
Like crazy fluffy.
Like too entirely much fluffy.
At first Mike and I were like ‘awww’.
He would hop over.
He was eating a baby carrot.
I should have known.
We had no baby carrots in the house.
Nom nom nom, he went.
And we were both, ‘aaaaawww’.
Little fluffy crazy mmmm.
And we stroked him and stroked him.
We missed dinner.
The next day he was even fluffier.
He just lay there, legs in the air.
Looking at us with those big white eyes.
What happened to the redness, Mike asked
Is so fluffyyyyyyy I responded.
He did a little sneeze.
And Mike did a little cute gasp so hard he passed out.
Hit his head on the corner of the coffee table.
Got home from hospital to find the rabbit.
The bunny now, he’d gone full bunny.
Tiny wickle nose.
Just tiny little carrots.
He’d made a wee bed out of cotton balls and was snuggling up inside.
All snuggly and sniffy.
Felt something go in my throat.
The bunny rolled onto his back like he fell over oh my god
I squeed again.
Felt a bubble of pain.
Coughed up some blood.
Maybe he overheard us one night.
Maybe that’s it.
We were discussing bedroom equipment.
I said I wanted a nicer rabbit.
We tried explaining to him.
Talking to him like he was a person.
He climbed inside a little flower pot.
He was so cosy in that flower pot.
Mike smiled so much his front teeth cracked.
We tried taking him back to the shop.
Couldn’t pick him up.
Couldn’t get purchase.
So fluffy, like a little furry cloud with these eyes that just look at you
Awwwwwwwrrrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaahhh ah ah ah my heart
Pain in my arms.
My hands so calloused from stroking.
We bundled him up in the carpet.
Drove to the river.
Threw it in.
Came home to find him.
Wearing a tiny little fireman’s uniform.
Where did he get it?!
Such a little hat!
He just wants to put out tiny fires.
Ow. Ow. I can’t.
Mike can’t breathe. He just keeps intaking breath because he so
Ohmygod he’s wet now.
He’s been swimming, so wet and
Awww he doesn’t like the wet no he doesn’t
But he’s so small and its..
He’s sleeping in a teacup!!!
Listen to his little rabbit breathing.
Mike’s gone purple.
Tiny little sunglasses.
Eating a lettuce leaf.
So cool eating your lettuce leaf.
You don’t care, no
My insides are rising and I don’t –
He’s in the palm of my hand
He can onwy fit in da wickle palm of
Looking up at me.
My vision’s going red.
Look at him though.
Looking at me..
Look at him…